For So Long I’ve Waited

for so long i’ve waited
for my life to be filled
by something
(something more than me).
something else.
some song (some one).
some voice. waiting…
and i never rose to walk.

i’ve wanted to though.
i’ve wanted…
instead, i just waited.
(waited for…)
and the rain just fell
(fell for…)
against my window
(on my rooftop).
and i only half listened
as the hours moved
over me.

it wasn’t suppose to
be like this (empty).
i was suppose to create.
to come to know. to believe.
to walk in the rain
(to lift my cup in it).
and to drink what
i gathered from the sky.
i was suppose to touch
things unseen
(to trace their voices
for others to see).
to live in greatness.
to live with greatness.
but i am far from this.
i am far…(too far).
how? why?